Sunday, October 2, 2011

They Play Baseball In October? - BORRRRRRRING


Every day during the MLB postseason, NotHawk will "recap" the games that took place the day before. Just so you don't have to watch, because he's charitable like that.

MILWAUKEE 4 ARIZONA 1

I tried to get into this game on Saturday, but I just couldn't. National League baseball is boring enough, but when it features two teams as generic as Milwaukee and Arizona, it's even worse.  Yovani Gallardo shut down an Arizona lineup filled with heavy hitters like Lyle Overbay, and Fatty Arbuckle homered to drive in two runs and give Scott Boras an erection.


Milwaukee leads the series 1-0

PHILADELPHIA 11 ST. LOUIS 6

This game had a little bit of everything for me. I enjoyed seeing Roy Halladay give up a three-run bomb in the first inning, and ever since I fired his arrogant ass, I always enjoy seeing Tony La Russa fail. Maybe if you would have had your pitcher bat seventh you would have won, Tony! You might have had a better chance if you had a pitcher not named Kyle Lohse too! Ryan Howard continued the trend of fat dudes hitting bombs with a three-run homer in the sixth to give Philly the lead for good.

Philadelphia leads the series 1-0

TEXAS 8 TAMPA BAY 6

This game looks like it might have been interesting, so it's too bad I didn't watch it because I had $5,000 on the Florida/Alabama game last night. Thanks for sucking, Florida! Your failures make the Hawkaroo rich. All I heard about this game was that Derek Holland has a mustache, so congrats on reaching puberty, Derek.

Series tied 1-1

NEW YORK 9 DETROIT 3

I'm not exactly rooting for the Tigers, but I do feel some kind of AL Central solidarity thing happening. So I can't help but feel like the Tigers got fucked by MLB with the suspension of Game 1. Detroit needs Justin Verlander to win this series, and MLB and the rain stole a start from Verlander. Which ended up with Robinson Cano hitting a grand slam and driving in 6 runs against Doug Fister.

New York leads the series 1-0

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